Monday, August 23, 2021
5 comments:
Please structure your comments as follows:
Positive - Something done well.
Thoughtful - A sentence to let us know you actually read/watched or listened to what they had to say.
Helpful - Give some ideas for next time or ask a question you want to know more about.
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Oh no! Poor detective turning into a bird monster?
ReplyDeleteI like how you have used different kinds of sentences to make your writing more interesting.
Remember how we have learnt that a good sentence will start with a capital letter and finish with a full-stop. Can you please go back and fix this in your writing?
Next time think about what other details and description you can use to make you story even more impressive.
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteSorry about that,I have now fixed it
DeleteHi Manaia! What a great story you created! I wonder what the detective's name could be? I also was keen to find out what happened in the forest, a bird detective could have all kinds of fun and problems I think... could you add in a bit more to finish it off? You have used lots of interesting language and created a fast moving and eventful story already! I would love to read a bit more of your exciting writing!
ReplyDeleteI did that
ReplyDelete